Painfully Hip International: New York-Reykjavik-Copenhagen-Berlin-Beyond…

Yesssss. That’s right. I’ve caught the wanderlust again. We’ll just try and forget that this idea is way beyond my means, that i just spent the hottest months of the summer in the southern Arizona desert, and that I’ve been keeping nothing but my pet flies in my wallet… The itinerary is set, the fingers are crossed and I’m headed north at the coldest time of year to some of the chiliest and most stylish cities in the northern hemisphere.

My mission? To see how I, a Bona Fide Desert Child, will keep warm and functional but still, er, Painfully Hip, while traveling solo with nothing but a tiny backpack for awhile.

winter outfit

Something tells me that this little number just won’t cut it.
via LOOKBOOK.nu: “woodland creatures, plaid, houndstooth, zigzags and argyle” by Painfully Hip

I’ve come up with some janky schemes in my life, but this one’s a doozie.

So far I have a one-way ticket to Reykjavik and enough dough saved to get me to Copenhagen if I couchsurf. Inter-European travel is ridiculously cheap, so if everything goes as planned, I would like to chase the sun all the way through Spain and/or Italy to Marrakech and/or Athens. My return ticket will just have to wait. But I’m getting a little ahead of myself now, I need a plan. And I can’t let this muggy, monsoon-baited weather make getting stranded in Iceland sound like a good idea.

First things first.
Ideas:

  • Read the new eBook, The Wanderlust Workbook by Sarah of Yes and Yes, who just happens to be leaving on a well-planned, perfectly executed 9 month long journey across the opposite hemisphere departing on almost the exact same moment as my janky one.
  • Seriously, this book rocks. If I didn’t pay heed to this delightful publication, I’m pretty sure I would have ended up in the fetal position in an shitty airport hotel in Copenhagen snotting into the phone at my mommy.

    Wanderlust Workbook Yes and Yes

  • Throw a Fashion Show and Benefit for Hope Animal Shelter on Aug 27th at Club Congress and schedule a million photo shoots (yes, I realize these won’t help with either problem, but at least they’ll keep me distracted)
  • Start a Wardrobe Consulting Business – will travel (duh)!
  • Get a Second Job (ooh Arizona, your minimum wage makes me saaaaad)
  • Put myself under house arrest till October
  • Lend my body to medical studies (thanks, Sarah!) or sell my plasma in spite of my irrational fear of needles
  • Ask you guys what your best travel tip / get rich quick scheme is.
  • GIVEAWAY: The TOP TWO TIPS in the comments on this post will get a FREE download and mp3 of Sarah’s gem-laden eBook, The Wanderlust Workbook (plus some extra feel-goodies!

Check Me Out: Zocalo Magazine’s New Fashion Director

Today I had a sweet brainstorming session with seasoned commercial photographer (and my newest collaborator – stay tuned), Steven Meckler and David Olsen, the founder of Tucson’s Urban glossy Zocalo Magazine, who have dubbed me their new Fashion Director. YAY. Not fully grasping what that meant until after said meeting, I attempted to dress the part – eye-catching, but classic and professional. What better thing to wear than possibly my all-time tippety top most flattering dress, this buttery leather rucksack (thank you, Thomas Lyte!), and the most comfortable, versatile loafers in existence.




Leather Rucksack

photos by Abraham Cooper

Stripey Zara Dress, $4 – Buffalo Exchange Outlet (oh say, can you spot me on their homepage?) Did you hear? Horizontal stripes have now been proven to be more flattering than vertical!
Thomas Lyte Rucksack – have you ever seen anything so beautiful? Absolutely perfect for transporting my laptop on my bike.
Vintage Nude Tassled Loafers, $1 – Phoenix Thrift Store
Gold Fern Earring – a gift from my good friend, Laura Kepner-Adney, Wingflash Designs
Gold Filigree Statement Rings, $5 – 4th Ave Street Fair

Tucsonans, please mark your calendars for Painfully Hip’s first fashion show on August 27th at Hotel Congress! It will be a benefit for Hope Animal Shelter, Tucson’s only no-kill, cage-free haven for abandoned dogs and cats.

Painfully Trite Twitter Tweets for 2010-07-18

  • Slasher flick as inspiration for a fashion editorial? I think yes. – http://mylikes.com/r/EKa #movies #
  • It defense of conjunctivitis-inducing hideousness…. http://bit.ly/c67nCi #
  • Its SO hideous I just had to have it. http://bit.ly/c67nCi #
  • 's A/C unit sounds like an intergalactic sword battle, but LOUDER. Tonight I choose lack of sleep by UFO noise or by sticky, searing heat. #

Check Me Out: Vested Interest

I don’t know what it is lately with the ugly. I find something hideous… like spontaneous conjunctivitis-inducingly hideous… and I can’t resist it. The more it makes me want to wretch, the more I have to have it in my closet. From a late ’80s Hawaii souvenir dress (yeah, it said “Aloha” all over it, what?) to high-wasted acid washed mom jeans with weird assymetrical leather paneling on them… I’ve procured an impressive wack o’ ugly in the last few weeks.

My only theory is that I can’t pass up a styling challenge. But how in the name of the Land’s End catalogue do I make this sad, vest-shaped collection of buttons and polyester look good? Not sure I succeeded. Maybe total fail. I keep thinking just what if I had remembered to button that bottom button? Or added one more accessory… or 3? But that might be like topping a three day old McDonald’s Filet O’ Fish with truffle shavings – it could contribute some vague palatability, but it’s more just a waste of perfectly good truffle shavings.

  • Gross Adjustable Vest Thingy With a Print of What Looks Like that Magic Clock Which Turns Out to be a Portal to the Lair of the Red Bull in The Last Unicorn and Some Weird Playing Cards From the 1800s Printed On It – St Vincent Thrift Store Free Room reject
  • Vintage Brooks Brother’s hat (my absolute favorite hat EVER) – Some Like It Vintage, Tucson AZ
  • Gap 1969 Legging Jeans
  • Vintage 70s Stacked Wedges – Thrift Store
  • Pheasant Feather Earrings – Cuffs Urban Apparel

Painfully Trite Twitter Tweets for 2010-07-11

  • The perfect outfit for showing some flair for your 4th 0′ Party without looking like a republican. http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=20381699 #
  • Oh awesome. I live in Arizona and my AC has stopped working. It was nice knowing y'all… #
  • Never have I been known to curse my lack of mammary fortitude more than this. http://bit.ly/avpPvC #
  • Have you ever asked a $100 Question? I have! Answer as much as you wanna for a chance to win $100! http://snipr.com/z4ht2 #
  • "Experience, as a desire for experience, does not come off. We must not study ourselves while having an experience."
    -Friedrich Nietzsche #
  • Painfully Beauteous – The Artwork of Fuco Ueda http://bit.ly/bDwYqC @zombielace "She’s turning that image of harmless, gentle femininity on its head!" #
  • Painfully Beauteous – The Artwork of Fuco Ueda http://bit.ly/bDwYqC "It's like if Studio Ghibli funded a fashion editorial!" #

Painfully Beauteous – The Artwork of Fuco Ueda

The internet gasped audibly when Fuco Ueda launched her website last year. Ueda’s works of in-exhalable beauty (acrylic and powdered mineral pigments on paper, cloth, and wood) are cloaked with an intangible darkness which is sometimes cloyingly subtle. However, in Fuco Ueda’s earlier works from 2000-2001 themes of stripey socks, incandescent sea creatures and schoolgirl honey drool give way to lost innocence, vulnerability, clutched skulls, and defenseless goldfish. A period so dark, it would best be described in the voice of Werner Herzog. I’ll shoot him an email.

Fuco Ueda’s prolific portfolio
via My Modern Met










Continue reading Painfully Beauteous – The Artwork of Fuco Ueda

PHDC: The Perfect Periwinkle Patterned Dreamsuit

In training for my first Arizona summer, I am quickly learning that owning 2 or 3 swimsuits will not suffice. So I’ve been on the lookout for a 60s swimsuit without those dreaded torpedo cone cups. You know, the ones that the less blessed-of-bosom have to be constantly monitoring in case an errant elbow suddenly renders one concave?

Never have I been known to curse my lack of mammary fortitude more than last week when I was buzzing around Phoenix styling a test shoot for fashion photographer Mark Morgan. I was ransacking the lovely Butter Toast Boutique oohing and ahhing in an annoying fashion, when it hit me that the perfect periwinkle patterned 60s swimsuit was balking at me from its high horse on the mannequin at the front of the store. It was from Merry May Handmade and it had all the perfect elements… except that it was not made for a 30-something woman who would likely still fit into her 7th grade training bra. Luckily, there was a shapely 16 year old Ford model standing in the wings, ready to fill those cups with aplomb.

Oh… curses.

Vintage Swimsuit

Photo by Mark Morgan
Model – Victoria Klemme, Ford Models
Hair & Makeup – Haley Irene
Styling by Amber Mortensen

Today I asked a $100 question! Answer it in the comments at BlogHer and you could be $100 richer! Think of all the socks you could buy to stuff your cones with!
$100 Question Promo Graphic

Check Me Out: Silk, Chainmail, and Denim

Photo by Tyler Mussetter, M Portraits.
Gold leaf earrings, silk chainlink top, beaded belt, and platform wedges from one of my favorite boutiques, Cuffs Urban Apparel.

As you know, I’ve been riding the skinny jean bandwagon for quite some time and can’t imagine letting them go as my staple denim with any kind of swiftness. But I do have one skinny jean rant. You know when you’ve pulled on your favorite pair of skinnies for the third day since laundry day and you notice they’ve come down with a bad case of Saggy Knees Syndrome? It can strike at any moment, but not to me, not anymore!

Unlike those crappy denim leggings that have been plaguing the skinny jean marketplace with their elastic waists, silly screen-printed grommets and (god forbid) flesh-colored gussets, these 1969 Gap Legging Jeans actually look like real jeans. They have double seams, a functioning fly, and just enough stretch to allow proper shaking of one’s groove thing (but not so much that you’re walking around with knees like deflated balloons). They also fit like they were sewn right onto me. That’s real denim-human LOVE.