So I recently scored myself a buh-dunk-a-dunk (sp?)! Maybe it was all the cheap cheese pizza and beach bumming I’ve been indulging in since I moved to Honolulu, but blessed has been my derrier with girth. Praise Cheezus.
As it turns out, no one has made me feel better about said newly-acquired girth than Levi’s®. Instead of upgrading my assets to a larger size, they assigned my ample trunk junk something called a Curve ID (take their quiz to find your own!), and then sent me some jeans that I’m pretty sure are 84% responsible for getting an incredibly non-douche-y male to profess to me his undying love. Perhaps I should retract my previous statement and thank the male, but that’s a conversation best saved friends who owe me something.
Long story short: these jeans are miraculous. I can style these bad boys any way I like, from monochrome androgyny to vibrant femininity.
vintage chambray top – Goodwill, Honolulu
braided leather belt – Barrio Vintage, Honolulu
woven platform sandals – eBay
scarab ring – JewelMint
mock-crock satchel – Cuffs, Sacramento
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mix pattern top – Barrio Vintage, Honolulu
yellow seed bead bib necklace – Gem Show, Tucson
Nine West T-strap Platforms – Ross, Phoenix
photos by Bradley Rhea
Continue reading Levi’s® + Painfully Hip = Unconditional Curve Love
And now, if you’ll allow me, I must talk about my new Ray-Bans.
Sale Price $96.75
Aren’t they just made of butterscotch?? Well, velvet smooth (seemingly unbreakable) plastic and tortoiseshell. Somehow both timeless and shamelessly modern.
Never before have I allowed my eyewear-abusing-self such quality, but the nice folks at ShadesDaddy somehow knew that I’d misplaced my $6 sunnies with a premature desert summer and an imminent move to Hawaii encroaching. From now on, I am a reformed sunglass-loser/abuser. My new mantra: “On my face or in the case! If you lose these, Amber, you deserve a firm noogying.” Try it! It’s catchy.
Sunglasses also come in handy for sneaking sideways glances at things you’re not supposed to.
And look! They even look good on future supermodels!
Color me in love.
Photos by Jon Saupe and Abraham Cooper
Model is Rachel Ann Yampolsky (Good Luck at FORD, hun! You’re a shoo-in.)
There is also a super cute collection of sunglasses to be found at www.very.co.uk. Go ahead, check ‘em out.
To say this month so far has left me over-stimulated would be a massive understatement. It’s gotten to the point where if a unicorn waltzed up to me in a pair of vintage YSL pumps and started doing a shockingly accurate Philip Seymour Hoffman impression, I would say, “Yeah, that looks about right” and then take a nap. So woosh, just like that, my friend Nico invites me to his ‘rents empty beach house in San Diego for some R&R. “I am so there, I’m already there,” I say. I’m in desperate need of some ME time.
CONTINUE READING for a chance to win $100 worth of Mary Kay Cosmetics!
Continue reading Check ‘Er Out: It’s Me Time [CONTEST!]
For reasons unknown, my eight-year-old self did not like Kmart. When her mom shopped there, she stayed in the car and listened to Tiffany with her twin sister, who also did not like Kmart. We liked the ICEEs they sold there, the large selection of 99¢ cassingles, that titillating Blue Light Special… But some ambiguous stigma prevented us from realizing that whoever catches you buying questionable pants at Kmart, probably also buys his pants there too.
My eight-year-old self also thought that gluing plastic spiders to white denim cut-offs was fashionable.
I’m never one to turn down a challenge, so when Lucky Magazine offered me a pretty darn cute lookbook and a Kmart gift card, I went. Boom. Before my platforms even crossed the threshold I found this little ditty of a skirt on the sidewalk sale rack for $2.99. Not bad at all!
I’ve gotten myriad compliments on it, even from straight men.
Tank – Kmart, $4.99
Skirt – Kmart, $2.99
Tribal Earrings by Laura Kepner-Adney of Wingflash Designs
New hairs by the one, the only, the genius, Addam B Moreno.
Have you ever purchased a garment that managed to change your entire outlook on life? A garment so wearable, functional, comfortable and versatile, you can barely bring yourself to remove it? I went from moving myself to the desert, in denial that temperatures below 40F exist, to hanging out in Iceland and Lithuania in late fall for fun and not even bothering to complain about the weather.
This little coat by Merrell is responsible.
This is me after being stranded overnight in a heinous snowstorm in a convertible with no heater. I am not even kidding. Yes, I may look a tad bit FRAZZLED, but I am miraculously ALIVE.
It’s not just the cute toggle buttons that make this coat amazing. It is the warmest thing I’ve ever sported, but it is also breathable, and compact enough to fit in my backpack or drape over my bag while shopping. It has deep, numerous and hidden pockets for passports, bicycle keys, train tickets and stolen pub coasters. It even looked chic with the $14 mall dress I bought at the mall to meet a Lithuanian president in.
 Berlin  Reykjavik I am in love. Copenhageners say that there is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing. I am starting to believe them.
Know what else I was a genius for bringing to Europe? These little numbers from MustHaveShoes:
Supplemented with some amazing arch supports (from Foot Petals), these boots were perfect for miles and miles of walking. They were warm, but low profile in the suitcase, gave me jusssst enough height to feel slightly more Giselle-like but still be comfortable, and melded seamlessly with every outfit I brought.
What is the best thing you ever packed for a delightfully impractical vacation?
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All images were either created by the Painfully Hip Design Collective, used with permission, or found on the web and believed to be in the public domain. If any images that appear are in violation of copyright law, please let me know and i will remove them immediately.
Thanks for reading,
Amber
painfullyhip at gmail.com
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