Painfully Hip » Every Day is Halloween

Happy Hallows Eve!

amber — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 18:01:22 +0000

When you’re a stylist working on a farm, what else are you gonna do but show the insects how its done?
- Praying Mantis

photo by Kaary Ogard

PHDC: Fire Warning! Summer Trends Adapted for the Desert (or just …reality)

amber — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 18:02:01 +0000

I can say without a doubt that the following shoot was the most death defying to date… and that’s including the time we shot in a haunted antiques warehouse in the bowels of the most crime-ridden neighborhood in Oakland!
After we were forced to abandon our original plan of shooting on top of nearby Mount Lemmon because of severe fire conditions (didn’t think it would be cool to be running a smoke machine up there – we prefer to prevent mass hysteria when possible), we drove wayyyy out into the desert in search of a few trees.
Following several miles of meandering dirt roads we came upon this ominous cracked crater of a pond bed surrounded by sparse mesquite trees in the middle of a known smuggling corridor and thought, “Well it’s no forest, but it’ll do.” Amongst the storm of gunshots we kept hearing with disturbing consistency, this location afforded some pretty amazing captures. David Olsen, the editor of Zocalo, seemed to like it too, he made the first one the cover shot for the June issue! Worth it? You tell me…

Fire Warning:
Summer’s Hottest Trends, Adapted for Life in the Desert
By Amber Mortensen, Painfully Hip

Photos by Ryan Mihalyi
Wardrobe Styling and Art Direction by Amber Mortensen and Bradley Rhea
Hair by Raul Mendoza at Fringe Salon (4861 E Grant Rd #111)
Model: Jessaca Marie Haag
Special thanks to Abraham Cooper and Jonathan Saupe

It’s June in the desert. The sun is relentless, cicadas are celebrating, and temperatures are rising, but what’s this? Hemlines are descending, modesty is rampant, and …black is the new black? Well, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but pretty much every trend you’ve come to associate with summer (sundresses, shorts, mini skirts, color, color, and more color) have been sent to trial by fire this year. So how do Tucsonans keep cool when fashion publications are telling us that long sleeves, trousers, ankle length hemlines, and black are haute stuff this season? Anything loose and floaty has risen to the top of my wish list. Especially chiffon, the textile equivalent of whipped cream. It’s cool, breathable, and just plain sumptuous. American Apparel (988 E University Ave) offers loads of the stuff. Maxi skirts, cropped blouses, long-sleeved button-ups and even pants in delicious sheer chiffon.
As far as these allegedly low hemlines go, skirts are especially versatile this season. I recommend the high-waisted variety, paired with a fluttery, cropped top or a fitted tank. I love a billowy maxi skirt as a swimsuit cover-up (as seen at the TYP/TFG runway show last month at the Fox Theater), but really anything below the knee is hip for summer. Just don’t forget to add an airy pair of gypsy-esque trousers to your closet while you’re at it.
Black is in, but so is nude. Now with this list of trends, it would be understandable to just decide to translated this to streaking, but first let me explain. Nudity (as far as I know), is still illegal in downtown Tucson, but anything wearable from light peach to pinky beige to tan is so hot, it’s barely legal. All the way down to your toe nail polish, nude is the new black, at least for us desert-dwellers.
And of course there is always room for color on my spectrum, especially for accessories like skinny leather belts and hats. Mindlessly pairing saturated blues, greens, purples and turquoise with your nude, black and otherwise neutral separates will make you appear as though you’ve got this color-blocking trend on lockdown. The point however, is to take whatever trends you’re into this season and make them your own somehow. That’s something we Tucsonans are best at.

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Couldn’t resist including this hotness in conclusion (Abraham was the best fog wrangler in tarnation):

One Dress Three Ways: County Fair Chic

amber — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 23:16:04 +0000

Remember how your mom would dress you and your four siblings the same when you all went to Universal Studios or a three legged chili cook-off or something and you’d hypothesize profusely about looking like buncha tools? No? Well, I was getting some vivid childhood flashbacks on Diana’s birthday. After we surprised her with a bedroom mini fridge (so she could do her two favorite things at the same time – eat and sleep), we kidnapped her to a secret location custom designed for nausea-inducing amounts of fun.

The good ol’ county fair. Diana’s only clue was a stipulation that she wear one of these identical graphic floral sundress which apparently none of could resist for $1 at the Buffalo Exchange Outlet. Admittedly, it should probably have interfered with her already decided on leopard print “birthday headpiece,” but she wasn’t going to let that stop her. It was her motherfucking birthday and we were going to be just fine in our obnoxious headpieces, 5 inch architectural wedges and stiletto heels, thankyouverymuch.

The following is a step by step example of How to Look Like a Bunch of Tools in Matching Outfits.

(photos by Ciaran Harman)

As we walked in, one security guard told us we looked like “those girls from the 1920s” while his friend exclaimed “SUPER DIVAS!” We were profoundly flattered. I’m pretty sure Diana hasn’t taken her leopard print birthday headpiece off since.

Nomad Land

jamaica — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 20:26:01 +0000

Ever since my relocation to the glorious Sonoran Desert, I can’t seem to get enough of sandy Southwest shades and be-jangled Bedouin baubles. (You may have even noticed that I wore the same coin scarf in both of my previous Check Me Outs. If so, give yourself a silver rupee.)

Granted, I’ve been on a gypsy kick for the past… well, ten years. This is mostly due to my impossible wanderlust and the fact that I share a birthday with Mata Hari. But whereas my past bindi/mehndi exploits may have hit one costumey note too many, this particular brand of nomad strikes a very wearable chord. Jewelry overload? Sure. But paired with knits, clean lines and subdued patterns, it’s more modern than maharajah.

And what better styling option for the upcoming scorcher that is an Arizona summer? Bring on the bare legs, white linen and headscarves!

Olesya Senchenko by Matteo Montanari | Mirage Spring 2010

Karmen Pedaru by Catherine Servel in The Wild Frontier | The Sunday Telegraph

via Fashion Gone Rouge
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Check Me Out: Impersonating Edie (…or attempting to)

amber — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 23:15:32 +0000

Last weekend was… as surreal as it gets. Describable in one made-up word: WARHOLMANIA.

The Tuscon Museum of Art is now showing an amazing collection of original Andy Warhol screenprints so they wanted to do something special for their opening. And special always means dead people impersonation, right? So Friday the museum invited Drew Krewer and I to come in full costume and full character as Andy Warhol and Edie Sedgwick, making a surprise appearance directly from that “Factory in the Sky.” We were even featured on the Six O’Clock News!

While Drew could easily sashay into the room with only his charm, his usual styling finesse and a spritz of silver hairspray, it took an entire team to get me in fighting Edie form. First off? The fabled dress by my beloved roommate and besty, Jamaica Cole of Sapphire Cordial (pictured in the previous post).

photo by Jessica Castillo

photo by Omer Kreso

(Hair by Addam Moreno, Makeup by Lynette at Toni & Guy, Tucson – Thank you!!)

And, of course, the ever-important jewels, designed by my dearest Laura of Wingflash Designs!

Paula Taylor and Amber Mortensen - photo by Tucson John

Necklace by Wingflash, Whipped Cream by Diana

While Edie managed to last about 27 years, I lasted exactly 10 hours – through the epic POP! Afterparty at the Rialto, complete with a Velvet Underground cover band, mylar photo booth, gallons of whipped cream, a Warhol Death Reenactment, endless dancing, and a good slathering of Tomato Soup. SPENT.

But no rest for the weary, because the next day we had a request to transform into go go dancers at the Eric Firestone Gallery. They had THE most amazing exhibit, including some never-before-seen Andy Warhol photographs. Unbelievable.

Jamaica Cole photo by Tucson John

Danielle Theriault Sit-Down Dancing photo by Tucson John

The gogo dancing lasted for 5 hours straight with no less than 4 costume changes each. So it goes without saying, I spent the last three days in bed. Sick as a dog. Like Edie coming down from a multitude of barbiturates.

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Check Us Out: Cigarette Girls From the Future

amber — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:06:40 +0000

Recently, art dealer Eric Firestone invited my two roomies and I to attend his latest opening for ’40s pop artist, Andy Burgess. But not to attend as just any guests, because this wasn’t just any party. The day after I returned from my 2 month adventure/ gargantuan workfest, I found myself quite the “working girl” once again. Hawking Lucky Strikes (they’re toasted!), Cubans, Emphysema, and vintage candy for tips… dressed as 1940s cigarette girls. That man sure knows how to throw a party.

photo by Krysta Jabczenski

I think after rushing around all day, we threw these get-ups together in about an hour. Life is good in this House of Stylists and Excessive Giggling.

This Week! Thanks to About.com and the New York Times, my new website, About Budget Style is LAUNCHED… in T-minus a whack of seconds. Watch here tomorrow for linkage galore! Also a big congratulations to my friend, Mai on her beautiful new store, Threadsence!

Painfully Fluky: Halloween 2009

amber — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 20:13:09 +0000

So I hadn’t been planning on dressing up for Halloween at all until about 45 minutes before launch time – sometimes it feels like getting dressed up these days qualifies as “work.” By the time I had resolved to pull the trigger on an actual costume, I was rather stumped – my wardrobe has dwindled decisively over the course of my transient lifestyle.

By pure fluke, however, I had wandered into the “Free Room” at my local thrift store earlier that day and found this pristine early 60s ivory brocade A-line… not something I would normally wear, fit so well and was free-not-to-mention, that I scooped it up. Not having time to dramatically alter my hair, a half-assed Betty Draper of Mad Men was pretty much my only option.

While I’m addicted to Mad Men, I’m not usually one to costume myself as the Flavor of the Year. But considering that about 48% of the population likely dressed as characters from Mad Men, I could be overstepping by using the jaunty little word- fluky – when I tell you that my best friend Richard in Vancouver had corresponded inadvertently by dressing as Betty’s philanderous husband, Donald… but that’s just the way I am.

Rich photos by Janos Sitar and Jillian Mccavour
Amber photos by Abraham Cooper
Mad Men photo from Fabric Magazine

preen (and buffalo exchange!) fashion show for tucson HocoFest 2009

diana — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 17:45:24 +0000

what’s HocoFest? oh, you know… i had no idea either. until there was a fashion show involved (and that right there sums up the extent of the brain-space i devote to anything non textile-related…).

so turns out, it’s a pretty freakin’ awesome 3-day festival that “a celebration of all things music, solar & sustainable during labor day weekend in sunny tucson, AZ- home to one of the best indie music scenes in the states.”
(aw! thanks hocofest website! i think tucson has one of the best “indie music scenes in the states” as well!)

emilie, half of the preen-ownership duo. um, was this dress MADE for her, or are you going to be
stubborn and argue with the obvious?

so everyone’s favorite vintage shop in tucson, preen, would be getting involved, obviously.
how so? by combining with the also-fabulous buffalo exchange to create a ”sustainable fashion show.”

um, hi world! did you say that the show involved all things thrifted and vintage?
huh… i suppose we could work within those parameters.

pre-show. we (and by “we” i mean emilie,) did a fantastic job with the theme, no?

so the theme was “glam rock,” something which i personally have never embraced as a style choice. it turned out to be a lot of fun to work with though, actually.

amber and i spent way too many hours combing through photos of david bowie, lamenting over our lack of one armed/one legged psychedelic jumpsuits, and listening to all things sparkly and amazing in our itunes. we styled some really amazing catwalk outfits, which were immediately tossed out the door the minute we set foot in preen and realized we had some serious options to work with.

me, amber and evee, wearing more makeup, leopard print and hairspray than we will for
the entire rest of the year combined.

so preen had eight models total, and buffalo exchange had somewhere around 30, but we totally managed to kill it anyway. the missing 8th model from the group picture at the top? this handsome looking fellow, abraham:

abraham, one of the only men i know who can totally rock pleather pants and a sequined bomber.

something else amazing? tuani’s vintage gold fringe skirt, docs, and one glove:
seriously emilie, how do you pull this off?!?!

ok, so she’s glove-less here, but i promise one came on for the show…

so enough “behind the scenes” already, right?!?! you’re ready for some actual show-action!!
well, that’s “behind the scenes” too. (hey, best spot in the house. and a change of scenery…)

so… some of us had never actually walked the the runway before and were actually a wee bit terrified. i won’t say who this “someone” is, because i’d be embarrassed. (hey! i’m not a model, i’m a designer and a stylist! being stared at is terrifying!)

this photo does the situation no justice – we’re all on the runway at this point – which i’m cool with. but how does a girl with absolutely no catwalk experience pull it off when it’s her turn alone down the runway? well, if you’re ever in the same situation, i’ll give you a little hint: do your most ridiculous dance and pretend everyone is eating it up.

there’s no terror in large groups…

and not to save the best for last, but the show-stopper of the evening? i don’t think anyone can argue with this:

evee, in her cage-dress/vintage lingerie/black velvet little-boy blazer number, with the most amazing hair ever…

AND

um, yeah. an amazing trash can ball gown erin bradley, the other half of the preen
magnificence created by hand.
yeah, i said it. BY HAND.

and in case all that wasn’t enough, the Meat Puppets played immediately after our part of the show. the meat puppets! stop and think about that for a minute or two. seriously, how awesome are the 90s?!?!

Mad Boy: America’s Most Stylish 8 year old

amber — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:11:53 +0000

Oh happy day, Eve just found out seconds ago that the lil’ tinykins currently inhabiting her womb is a BOY! Soon to be named Ennio. Yesterday we were agreeing about how it seems that no amount of frills and lace can make a baby girl any cuter, but the absolute cutest way to dress a boy is to dress him like an old man.

In celebration of today, I just HAD to post these photos from GQ of Arlo Weiner (son of the creator of HBO’s Mad Men), currently being touted as America’s Most Stylish 8 year old. Needless to say? I believe.

“This is my Valentine’s Day outfit. The jacket and the pants are velvet. I love the tie because it’s really two ties stacked on top of each other. (My dad had to tie it for me.) The pink tie matched the pink shirt. I wore brown-and-white argyle socks for a random pattern.”

“My mom got the jacket for me—I love it because I love Frank Sinatra and this is like something he would wear. I wore the jacket with the pants because I like the different plaids together. I thought the blue in the necklace brought out the blue in the pants. It’s a blue orb with fire around it.”

“I have a lot of black outfits these days, so I needed the red ascot to add some color. I love red and black together—they each make the other stand out. I’ve worn this to school about 12 times.”

“The hat is like a Frank Sinatra hat. I wore the jacket with the tie because green and gray are my favorite blend. I’m holding my dad’s bag in the picture, but at school I use my dad’s old brown leather satchel.”

“This is my favorite outfit. The tie is a regular tie, but I tied it like that because I’ve seen it done that way in old English movies. Even though the tie and the jacket are different colors, they’re both striped, so I thought they looked right together. And I wore the vest and pants together because they’re both shades of red.”

It’s really funny too that Diana posted about stylish young’uns yesterday. We’re just on the same mission to elevate “cute” into the art-form it is.

Check out more of the adorable Arlo Weiner here:

“I was going to play miniature golf with my brother Charlie. You can see how much I like to mix patterns. I love argyle—I was wearing argyle socks, too. The red ascot brings out the red in the pants. The only thing I was unsure of was whether the shirt would be weird with the rest of the outfit, but I wore it anyway because it was too hot to wear long sleeves. The hat used to be my dad’s.”

“We were going to Getty Village and then having breakfast on the beach. I wanted to wear black and white. Most of my ties, like this one, are clip-ons.”

“I thought the sunglasses would go well with the pants because they’re both gold. The tie on my neck—that used to be the belt for my bathrobe, but I shortened it and turned it into that. I put the tie with the jacket because I liked the patterns together. My grandma gave me the cane. I thought it looked good with the pants.”

“I like to put random patterns together, so I picked out the green checkerboard tie with the gray checked jacket and then I wore the red vest underneath, because red stands out and brings the colors together.”

Congratulations, Squeevies! I love you!