Last week I received my first ever negative comment regarding an outfit:
Your blog is very well done… The photos of other people’s styles that you post are very creative and appealing. However, I feel that your style is somewhat average and bland. I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but it seems like you admire great and interesting fashion, yet your outfits seem typical and.. well, not so interesting. I was just curious as to why you don’t seem to take many risks with your clothing.
I hope you don’t take this the wrong way. Just some constructive feedback!
-Lenora
Gah.
As this was in response to my relatively adventurous turquoise leopard print dress and weird neon purple and yellow astronomy-patterned bag, I was a bit astounded at first. As I thought of ways to defend my shallow sense of dignity (not limited to simply deleting the comment and going on my merry way), astonishment quickly turned to defiance, then quietly to resolve. She was totally calling me out on my shit!
The reason I started this blog was because of my love of shopping at a time when I lacked sufficient means to support even a weekly thrifting trip. The only things I ever bought were clothes that were flattering, comfortable and timeless – pieces from which I could squeeze my money’s worth. My practicality (nevermind my lack of dough) was literally stifling my personal style. Blogging gave me a way to “shop” for things I would love to be wearing at that very moment, without creating a vacuum in my wallet. Plus it constantly inspired me to make do with what I had.
Fast forward one year. I had moved to a new city, the perfect time to reinvent oneself. But now that I could afford a few thrifting trips, I was having a difficult time kicking old shopping habits. My new business is based in fashion and design, so I always have potential clients on my mind when I dress. I found myself watering down my personal style in order to try and please everyone’s expectations – an impossible feat. Plus, because my first love is travel, I hate being anchored down with all kinds of stuff. So I was still being uber-choosy and erring on the side of practicality on any given day.
This blog has changed my life in a multitude of ways. My personal style has evolved faster than the Silicon Valley gene-pool. It has also literally helped me become self-sufficient and that has boosted my long-waning confidence. I owe it to my readers to practice what I preach.
So, Lenora, I’ve decided. I have sorta been phoning it in. And if I can’t take constructive criticism from a perfect stranger, who can I take it from? I wouldn’t have been so offended if I didn’t know deep down it was a little bit true. Thank you for lighting a much needed fire under my ass.
After some months of rabid thrifting and clothing swapping, I’ve now got enough signature pieces to put together a few outfits which encapsulate the many personalities of my personal style (whilst shunning my inherent habit of being too goddamn practical). I’m taking this as a challenge to come out of my closet and start baring my soft style underbelly. Be gentle with me.
Personality #1 – Blinding Color

leather jacket – gift
knit hoodie – flea market, 75 cents
green silk top – UAL, New Orleans $39
Wimbledon tennis shorts – Painfully Hip clothing swap in Chicago
houndstooth tights – Macy’s $7
red patent pumps (with chunky grey heels) – Marshall’s $19
feather earring – borrowed from Eve
Personality #2 – Mixed Patterns

little boys’ pinstriped blazer – thrifted $3
silk rose-print top – thrifted in Chicago $1
paisley print wrap skirt – Susie’s Deals $3
tooled leather corset belt – a gift from foxhuntvintage
cream cable-knit knee-highs – thrifted on the coast $1
stacked heel cowboy boots with cutout pattern – $1 (SERIOUSLY), the rummage room at Atelier!
(close-up of patterns here)
Personality #3 – Modernized Flapper

chiffon flapper dress (seen here sans jacket) – a gift from Michelle of LadyLanguage
leather belt – borrowed from Eve (her blooming baby is foiling her ability to don this awesome belt she bought in Belgium).
nude lace-up heels – thrifted in Chicago $2
Naik Fur hat – a gift! (available at Atelier for around $50)
Personality #4 – Self-Contradictory
(dressy vs. casual / masculine vs. feminine)

ruffled top- Rainbow in Chicago $10
Lucky Brand cut-offs – Painfully Hip Clothing Swap in Sacramento
I think next time I will wear this with more casual shoes and a grandpa fedora to balance things out.
(Photos by Rory Toolan)
The Glamourai wrote a great post on the same issue (in response to a negative comment regarding one of her fucking genius outfits):
“there really is such a
thing as dressing for YOURSELF. i like myself better
when i feel good in an outfit. i feel empowered by a beautiful
detail or a kooky print, and when it’s cold outside, i’d much
rather wear 15 different fun things than one big boring
sleeping-bag of a puffer coat. the more the merrier!!!
who gives a flip if someone else thinks it’s too much?
they don’t have to wear it.
…
‘the selfish pleasure i get?
it’s not in having someone make my photo in the street
(although that’s always flattering). it’s the way people in cafes,
subways, gas stations – and yes, on the street – smile and engage
with me. in a world that can be very isolated & disconnected,
where many people are living lonely, my personal style is a
language that i’ve realized enables me to make new
friends all over the world.”
I want to thank you all again (SO MUCH) for reading my blog and taking my word for what it’s worth, in spite of my lazy style choices of late.
Here’s to dressing for ourselves!
xoxoxo
so the other day a friend of mine was whining (i mean, cheerfully reflecting,) about how she never seems to find any of these so-called amazing “scores” while thrifting. we weren’t very far into the conversation when she turned on me. ”oh yeah… you’re the bitch who found the brand new chanel pea-coat for $6!” she said. i would like to note that she was not using her inside voice at this point.
she then demanded that i “hand over” my secrets.
some good came from all this abuse though. it got me thinking about all the “thrifting tips” i’ve come up with over the years. then i remembered how much i like making lists, and i decided to combine the two.
would you like to see it? of course you would.
diana’s thrifting tips
- go regularly, and go on off-hours. the first helps you acquire more goodies. the second is for sanity’s sake. seriously though, if you don’t go on a regular basis. you’re just asking to miss all the good loot. you can take this a step further and inquire about “restocking” day. as in, when do they do it? then mark that day down in your little black book and make sure you go.
- a lot of the larger/more “established” thrift shops – especially in bigger towns and cities – have “last chance,” “outlet” and “as-is” shops. what this really means is “this is the place where we send all the goodies that didn’t sell in our full-price shops.” (tucson has “outlet” shops for both goodwill and the salvation army. all clothes are $1-$3, except for on “half-price” day, which seems to be every day i’ve gone in.) i can’t even begin to explain how wonderful these places are. it’s amazing what treasures make it to these shops. the ladies at the goodwill outlet told me clothes only get one week on the full-priced store racks before they get bundled up and shipped to the outlet. (i didn’t tell my bitter friend this, but it’s not just a chanel that i’ve thrift-scored – i found a vintage burberry trench at one of these “outlets” recently, for $2.98. seriously.)
- make a list of what you need, and refer back to it to avoid stocking up on things you don’t need. also, racks of $3 clothes are not an excuse to inundate your closet with heaps of poor-quality crap. there is no excuse for that. maintain your standards, ladies.
- shop off-season. you’ll find the best deals and have a better selection to pick through. (winter coats are plentiful and purchased for pennies in tucson in august. i would imagine the same would go for vintage sun dresses during january in vermont.)
- give some thought to a “thrifting uniform.” you want to wear something that is comfortable and easy to try things on over. (in case of long lines for – or even non-existent – changing rooms.) i like leggings, long, slim fitting tank or tee-shirt style dresses, a loose-fitting cardigan and slip-on flats. if you’re not wearing socks, at least slip a pair in your bag for trying on shoes. not doing so is gross. and i will judge you.
- you can also take an even easier route and throw a flexible sewing tape in your bag for taking measurements right there at the racks. make sure you have accurate measurements of yourself before doing this though.
- approach things with an open mind. if you go out with specific desires – “i want a pale yellow floral house dress made in 1953. in a size small.” – you’re probably going to be disappointed. remember that things can be shortened, re-sized, altered entirely – by you, a crafty friend, or even a tailor. and even factoring in the tailor’s fees, it’s still cheaper (and cooler) than buying something brand new and mass produced.
- try to find shops off the beaten path. shops in areas with a high population of amazingly hip college students will be a) picked over, and b) pricey. look for the ones near ritzy 55+ communities. go wild.
- i’m a little nervous about sharing this last tip, out of fear of a good lecture from anyone will a little self-respect, but just hear me out, ok? flirt. not in that creepy, “unwanted attention” sort of way. i’m not even suggesting you give out your phone number. but putting on a big friendly smile and striking up a conversation with the occasional employee – male or female – will do some pretty amazing things. i’ve actually found this to be useful in all areas of life. my brother once told me, “you could flirt a dog out of biting you!” which i take to be a compliment. i don’t see anything wrong with securing a “50% off everything, just for you… shh!” by using some (genuine) friendliness. it is my opinion that it brightens both party’s day.
compiling all this in one place has given me an uncontrollable itch to hit up my favorite thrift shops right this second, so i’m out, guys.
but before i go, i thought of one more thing – bring your own earth-friendly canvas shopping totes with you, and stuff those, rather than taking plastic bags. but i’m sure you already do that, right? high-five!
If you like this post, make sure you check out Amber’s thrifting tips in this related post:
Ask Painfully Hip: How do you make great finds at the thrift store?
i’ve been clipping photos, articles and entire editorials that i find inspiring for ages. i’m pretty sure i’m not the only one who does this. it’s great to have a collection of inspiring imagery on hand – my big problem though, was always how to store them in a usable way. once things got tossed in the “idea box,” very rarely did they see the light of day again.
i meant to start a “style journal” for quite a few years – one which i updated regularly and used as a reference tool. i’d started a few, but never really showed any follow-through until recently, while stuck in bed with the flu, i forced myself to tackle the project like i meant it.
i’m not even going to tell you how many days it took me to get through the whole stash. i will say however, that it was worth it. i feel excitement for my closet where there was only waning interest before. what’s even better is that i feel a little more direct in my enthusiasm. and anything that manages to accomplish the impossible task of drumming up some closet glee in the midst of the mid-season doldrums is a magical, magical thing in my books.

the amazing thing about keeping your own style journal, is that unlike wardrobe_remix or the multitude of other fabulous “daily style” photo sharing sites, your journal is for your eyes only. (unless you want to share.) it’s private. it’s not an end product, but a tool to create the end product. you don’t have to worry about presentation – it gives you a rare opportunity to really analyze what grabs you, and play around with things you might be intrigued by but not quite sure how to try.
daily “what i wore” sites, street style sites and personal blogs offer endless inspiration, but unless you’re one of the lucky few with a strong foundation, it can be easy to become distracted – and overwhelmed – by all the shiny pretty things. (i do not at all mean to imply that fantastic personal style is unattainable to all but a lucky few. what i am saying is that a little under-cover work is really all you need to take your style to a level that you feel best expresses who you are. that’s the whole point of style, right?)
this is how a style journal helps. it’s a foundation you build to support your needs. it’s a fantastic go-to source of immediate style inspiration, catered specifically to your preferences. it’s a reference point to remind you of what you are striving for on days when you feel less than inspired. it’s actually (i’ve decided) a pretty awesome thing to have around.

still not convinced? that’s ok. i’ve got more.
- putting it all in one place and being aware of your preferences will help you start to see what works for you, and what doesn’t. most of the time we’re attracted to styles that work with our personality and body type, and having a collection of options at your fingertips will remind you of how many choices you really do have.
- knowing what works for you – and what you like – will keep you from being blindly pulled from one trend to the next, and help you develop your closet into a well-thought out and coordinating collection of pieces that work for you and work together. (just think about that for a minute…)
- keeping a style journal will help you become a more efficient and conscientious consumer – which saves both money and the environment. it will help you know what you are looking for when you are buying, which really – when you think about it – seems like a silly thing to even need to mention. we don’t wander blindly through a car lots, test driving random vehicles that strike our fancy. very rarely do we even wander into a grocery store without some sort of shopping list to remind us of what we need. wardrobe investments should be no different.
- a style journal gives you a tool to help better understand yourself, which in turn allows you to present yourself in a more thought-out and complete way. what happens then? people take you more seriously and treat you with more respect. the way you present yourself is how the world sees you, and if you appear confidant and organized, the world will respond accordingly.
the way you decide to keep your style journal is entirely up to you. i’ve found it extremely helpful to make notes in mine as i go along, but i know some people also like to keep theirs as a picture-only sort of log. a lot of times i will have a “style epiphany” when i’m looking at a picture, and my geeky self likes to keep a log of these things. the margins of my notebook are packed with things like “oh! i totally get why this outfit works, while a similar one i tried was a total flop…” or “this would look even better paired with —” i’ll even push the geek envelope one step further, by jotting down phrases, styles and eras that come to mind when i look at a picture that really inspires me. as silly as that sounds, it serves a purpose – it helps me see a common thread between previously (seemingly) unrelated images.
it goes without saying, but style is a life-encompassing word. your personal style is not limited to just your clothing choices, and any positive change you make in one area is going to affect other aspects of your life as well. as you get to know your likes and dislikes a little better, its fun to branch out into other areas of personal style (art preferences, home decor, etc.) and see where those take you as well. it’s all interconnected – have fun with it!
A couple weeks ago I took a jaunt to Los Angeles (mostly to get this old childhood itch called “Disneyland” scratched, but I may post on that later), and on our last day we took a walk down La Brea Ave for some vintage shopping. Attracted by the over-the-top display in the window, we decided to investigate.

Bowled over.
Immediately to my left as I walk in the door is an astonishing pair of the most pristine vintage pumps I have ever laid hungry eyes on. They look like they came right off Ginger Rogers after one light-footed traipse across the stage and directly into a life-preserving oxygen chamber just for the delight of my unsuspecting eyeballs.
Agape, I realize they are not alone. Every single pair. Immaculate.


True, most people I know won’t have $400 built into their clothing budget for a pair of museum quality vintage shoes, but walking into this place is like walking into a glittering, well-preserved cathedral for anyone remotely titillated by historical fashion. Its a museum you don’t have to pay for – unless you have a difficult time keeping your credit card in its holster. Perhaps in spite of my starry-eyed idea of “in focus,” you can get some vague notion of the opulence from these quick snapshots.









scarab necklace

amazing unworn maillots



They also have a few interesting historical torture devices, like this belt someone named Charlie lovingly welded for his new, and likely short-lived, girlfriend.
Thanks to Golyester for letting me drool all over everything for 45 minutes!
Golyester
Vintage Clothing and Textiles
Specializing in 1900-1960′s
136 S. La Brea Ave.
Los Angeles, CA
323.931.1339
I am moving to a new place which doesn’t yet have internet, so posting may be slightly sparse the next few days. Hope your Day of Gracious Gluttony was dually gratifying.
My friend Ira of Being Totally Sweet In Chicago pointed me toward this site that has been getting a lot of press lately called Advanced Style which features photos of, er, mature men and women with amazing style. I bet when I’m older I’ll be wearing the craziest duds I can lay my hands on just because, so what, I’m your elder.
Check this out, these elders look amazing and can probably pull off ANYTHING.







Bead Artist, Suzanne Golden

Style Maven, Anna Piagi
(a young Piagi was highlighted in this post)
Its incredibly comforting to know that perhaps someday I’ll be aged to perfection. Yay!
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All images were either created by the Painfully Hip Design Collective, used with permission, or found on the web and believed to be in the public domain. If any images that appear are in violation of copyright law, please let me know and i will remove them immediately.
Thanks for reading,
Amber
painfullyhip at gmail.com

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